Why I Watch, part 2

Because "sinister conspiracy theories" are no less real for being sinister.

Remain calm people

It is but a ruse. We're still here.

The crazy tree is in bloom--pay no attention

Some forms of dissent are not patriotic. That would be the kind practiced by fat, old, white crazy people. No, no, not that fat, old, white crazy person. Confused? Not to worry. Rick Perlstein of the Washington Post will explain the difference for you.

Charlie Rangel says what everybody knows

Those people at the town hall meetings have been paid to raise a ruckas.

The story told by the President signifies something

Here at Flag HQ we've received some Angry Rants about the President's New York Times op-ed. They seem to think that the story POTUS told in paragraph two is so vague as to be meaningless:

"A man lost his health coverage in the middle of chemotherapy because the insurance company discovered that he had gallstones, which he hadn’t known about when he applied for his policy. Because his treatment was delayed, he died. "

What man? they ask. What insurance company?

What these ignorant malcontents fail to understand is that the President was using what we here in the White House sphere call "rhetorical devices." "A man" is not necessarily a specific person--he represents all of us. I mean all of you. "The insurance company" is that vast, corporate conspiracy that wants to kill you. POTUS tells a cautionary tale: if we don't get healthcare reform you are all going to die of gallstones.

Don't get lost in irrelevant deets, people.

You know, people, stuff like this is not funny

It might just be racist. Nigerian spammers are people too. I wonder if we might need a visit from the Tolerance Czar?

Why I Watch.

Constant vigilance is required people. Constant.

It's my job to hunt the Nazis

Not Andrew McCarthy's. That's it--he goes on The List.

"The Obama Way"

It's the Obama way or the highway, folks.

Now there are some fine Americans

Got to hand it to Nancy--she sure can pick 'em.

Krauthammer speaks ill of preventative care

Why hasn't this guy listened to Joe Klein and stopped writing about stuff he doesn't understand?

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet

What if we called them "care consultants" rather than "death panels"? Then could we keep them?

Harry Reid is original

The man paints with words.

Ah, the New York Times

The only thing that could make this exceptional piece of creative journalism better would be listing the email and ip addresses of the malfeasants.

This is the United States of America, people

Not the "Grand Republic of Irrational Rants."

So shut up already. Your embarrassing your betters.

The beauty of random

We could have gotten this. Or this. Or, heaven forbid, this terrible two-headed monstrosity. But through the beauty of random selection, we drew this doe-eyed moppet. Take note people--flag if you will--what comes of early indoctrination. Did I say "indoctrination?" I meant "education."

Of course I did.

She. Does. Not. Exist.

Really. Sarah Palin does not exist. This does not have to do with her. This is real. She is a fantasy. Ignore her. Move along. Nothing to see in Alaska.

Fishy, forsooth

Come on, people, I had to learn about this from the Wall Street Journal of all places?

Listen to direction: we want to hear about the fishy.

Sometimes words can mean two things!

There has been some hysterical concern voiced by fringe elements who are confused by the establishment of the flag@whitehouse.gov program. They don't seem to get the subtle humor of the word "flag," which can mean both the emblem of the United States and--at the same time, follow along people--highlight, as in "notice." So by sending in fishy tidbits about your neighbors, that annoying Facebook friend that won't stop sending you messages, that stupid blog that you just can't quit no matter how stupid or wrong the author(s) are you will be doing your patriotic duty to help us notice disinformation.

And we will do ours.